#51 Jim Kwik- Limitless, Mastering your Mind, Hustle Culture

0 (0s): You believe adversity in our life, you know, it can become an advantage. You know, I don't know, think through struggle struggles, we get strength. I believe that sometimes, you know, your mess becomes your message. 1 (15s): Hello, everybody. You're listening to Chatting with Candice, I'm your host, Candice. Horbacz back before we get started on this week's episode, I wanted to do some shout outs really quickly. So first we're going to hop over to my locals page and I'm going to think bully frog. I want to say thank you to bully frog from locals. I want to say a big thank you to David Morgan, William Watson, and Luke Johnson from Patrion. And I wanted to thank Louis and Matthew B for all of those cups of coffee, all of the funds go directly back into the podcast. So you are helping support the advertising and the editing. And I couldn't. Thank you enough. 1 (55s): So this week, I can't believe we landed this guest. I'm so excited. I've been a big fan of his for awhile. His new book Limitless is amazing. So if you haven't checked it out yet, I highly encourage you to order it. It's a really fun read with lots of useful tips and tricks on how to master your mind. Please help me welcome the one, the only Jim Kwik. Well, Jim Kwik, I can't believe we are virtually sitting down together and actually having this conversation. I met my husband and I have been consuming your content for what feels like ages. And I know I was constantly sliding in your DMS and asking when we can make this happen and you're super busy. 1 (1m 37s): So I wanted to first say thank you so much, and I appreciate you making the time for me. 0 (1m 41s): Oh, I, I appreciate you. And I've been looking forward to it and thank you everybody. Who's joining us for this, for this conversation. 1 (1m 48s): Yes. Yes. Thank you to all listeners. I, I'm still reading your book. I'm on chapter nine and what I love so far about it and you can correct me if I'm wrong, but it's very pragmatic. Like you give a ton of useful, applicable tips on how to get the most out of your mind. And I I'm catching little bits of magic, which I think are so amazing. Especially once you start talking about dreams. So I'm really hoping that we can get into the dream element and that's just like right up my alley. So I like something that I can kind of apply it to myself in my daily life. And then also that kind of gives you like that spark of joy that gives you something to look forward to. 0 (2m 32s): Yeah. You mean dreams like, like the dreams that you have at night or the dreams that you have in terms of the vision? 1 (2m 39s): Both actually. Yeah, both. So I've been like this whole, the last, like two weeks have been Jim Jim weeks, all it's about all, about Jim Kwik in this house. So all of the COVID pass all of the books, all of like all of your content, just consuming before you got on. And I really related to you in the sense of being shy, like being like very shy, like don't look at me throughout school for one reason or another. I know. And it's probably a surprising for most people, right? Cause your profession, like you're a public figure, professional speaker, author, you host all of these really great workshops. And then I obviously am also a public figure as well. So it's like, how can these two people that have such a platform be shy? 1 (3m 21s): Like this seems counter-intuitive right. But I find a lot of people I talk to actually share this kind of this theme throughout adolescence. So I am curious, do you find that because your, your circles are also very public, do you find that a lot of those public figures as well have kind of gone through those trenches and shared that feeling of being shy and introverted and don't look at me? 0 (3m 46s): I think, yeah. I think my, my superpower growing up was really hiding, hiding in the shadows. And then, you know, because of my traumatic brain injuries than my learning difficulties, it was, it was becoming invisible. Right. I got very good at shrinking down and I think it set some level. We all want to be seen. We all want to be heard, but you know, I think out of trauma and fear, you know, you're looking for safety, you're looking to protect yourself. So I had to give a book for it. I would, you know, I would get, make myself so nervous. I would end up going to the nurse's office and, you know, making myself, you know, very sick and, and I wouldn't avoid getting the attention because I felt like at some level I wasn't enough and I didn't have a lot to offer. 0 (4m 31s): And, and it's interesting, right? The universe has a sense of humor. You know, my two biggest challenges were learning and public speaking and that's all I do for a living is public speak on this thing called Learning. But I do believe adversity in our life. You know, it can become an advantage. You know, I don't know, think through struggle struggles, we get strength. I believe that sometimes, you know, your mess becomes your message. Right? And I think that on the other side of it, it's sometimes like, I don't know, a strong person that had a really easy past, I did. I can't think of one person. And you know, the individuals that I would get to work with in sports or entertainment or politics or what have you, it's like everybody has their own path and there's no, there's no judgment and there's no right or wrong. 0 (5m 17s): We all have different experiences and the expectations, you know, access to different things. But I feel like there's a quote in Limitless from a French philosopher. He says, life is the sea between B and D. Life is C between B and D. And people might think about what does he mean? B stands for birth D stands for death life, see choice. I think all along the lines, we have choices that we can make. And, and sometimes we make mistakes and we don't even know that they're mistakes because that's, you know, there's some kind of judgment around that. Sometimes it just, you know, it's just a feedback, right. And you know, and, but our choices, you know, we are the sum total, maybe of this choices we've made up to this point, but I'm, I'm a big believer that today, you know, everyone who's listening that your today is stronger than all of your yesterdays combined. 0 (6m 9s): They just are right. We can change a lot of our past, but we can learn from it. And we don't have to be proud of our mistakes when it comes to a lot of people are, have a fear of making mistakes or looking bad. Like I did as a child, we don't have to be proud of them, but we can be proud of how we're handling it today. Right. And, and so, you know, life is life as best. They just, some like, just like Learning sometimes it's messy, but we control the controllables. And, and so for me, it was being not just introverted because I came from a family that had immigrated here and culturally, it was just very more reserved, but also going through school and being bullied teased, and, you know, made me more, more shut down and shy, which is different than being introverted. 0 (6m 54s): Right. So, yeah, but now, you know, I still need to sometimes have my own space. I don't know how you are, but it has been rejuvenate me. Yeah. 1 (7m 4s): Yeah. It's one of those things I was reading and it was their explanation of extrovert versus an introvert was that an extrovert tends to get energy from crowds and being around a lot of people and an introvert tends to get their energy from their solitude. And I would definitely be in the solitude category. It doesn't mean I don't like to socialize cause I do in like small doses. But if I go out too many times, even just like to dinners or just socializing a little bit too much, I'm like, I leave, I leave drained. 0 (7m 32s): Yeah. I feel like I was talking to Susan Cain, wrote a book called the quiet. I was talking to her and, and Simon Sinek, you know, is one of my favorite authors start with why. And they were saying, I, I liking it too in introvert, wakes up with five gold coins. And these coins represent energy. And every single time they engage with somebody, they give up one of their coins to that person. And then after they're done with their five, they have to go back and recharge an extrovert's different, an extrovert wakes up with no coins and they're going out. And every time they engage with somebody, they get a coin and get a coin. They get charged by it. But yeah, there's, there's, there's a lot of power in both kind of both personalities without a doubt. 1 (8m 15s): Yeah. I totally agree, man. So we have more in common than I thought. I also spent a lot of time in the nurse's office. Mine was more anxiety around lunchtime. I never knew where to say I moved a ton. So I never had a core group of friends that I really identified with. So that was like my out as well. And I cannot wait to get into your parenting segment that you have on like your bonus bonus content. Because a lot of this, we have an almost two year old, a lot of it, I try to apply to him in parenting because for me, it's like, I feel like I've done a lot of work to get where I am now. And I'm really in like a happy place and just continually like trying to, to grow and to learn and just improve myself. 1 (8m 59s): But it's like, I see all of this potential with him. Right. And how can I avoid as many missteps as possible with parenting? And a lot of people call it conscious parenting and, and all of that. I had one specific question from a selfish standpoint. So there's that age old saying that you're like, you, you are the average of the five people that you spend the most time with. Right. So it's like very important to be cognizant of where, like, who you're surrounding yourself with. And I feel like when it comes to kids, if you tell them to go left, they usually want to go, right. Like if they go through that rebellious stage. So when they're developing and kind of figuring out their sense of identity, how would you say to parent that I guess that lesson to them in like the way that they're going to absorb it more than fight it? 0 (9m 55s): I, I feel you I'm dumb. I'm not an expert on parenting, but the strategies that we teach are definitely a brain-based in terms of regardless of what age or what stage somebody is in. Certainly, you know, this phrase that we are, the people we spend time with the average of the people we spend time with. There's, there's definitely some truth to that. And we always tend to imitate the people around us. We have something in our nervous system called mirror neurons, where we tend to adopt. I always tell people to watch w a T C H I use a lot of acronyms and make a memorable, but we started imitating the w which is people's words. You know, children's will start using the same language as, as, as people in their household, you know, certainly. 0 (10m 42s): And then those that their friends, the a a and watch stands for actions. And regardless, regardless of her age, we start imitating the behaviors of the people around us, the gestures, the mannerisms, the, the activities, the tea, and watch stands for our thoughts, you know, which is that kind of that internal language that we have, which, you know, thoughts are very powerful. You know, the mind thoughts are the language of the Mind feelings are kind of like the language of our bodies. And we start having the same kind of thoughts of the people around us that are in our environment. Like when, when I was a child, I was slowing down a class and a teacher, you know, instead of, for the whole class at that's the boy with the broken brain. 0 (11m 23s): And, you know, that thought I was imprinted on me, right. Is that something I was born with? And, but I, that became my dominant thought. Every single time I did badly on a, you know, an exam or a book report, or wasn't picked for sports, which was pretty often, I would always say, oh, because I had the broken brain that thought two children just absorb those things. And then finally the C and the age to see a character, you know, in terms of, of who we are and the standards that we have, I read recently, somebody shared a quote thing. Integrity is measured by the distance between somebody's lips and their life. And I thought that was kind of interesting, you know, I feel like it's better, well done than well said, but then finally the HR habits and that we tend to pick up the same habits as the people, we spend time with eating habits, their study habits, their entertainment habits, you know, so it's not just our neurological networks, it's really our social networks. 0 (12m 22s): And, you know, and I think the things that I'll, I'll, I'll say when it comes to, to whether you're it's a teacher or a parent or anyone working with children, I believe it's better well done than well said, meaning that, you know, it's not just, we say it, we show it, you know, a lot of even online, you know, I think it's nice to post quotes and it's, you know, it's better than B don't promise it will be prove it. And I think that the life we live are the lessons that we teach, you know, the life we live, our lessons, we currently teach others. And so they won't, I don't think children with so much do as, as we say, as more as, as, as what we do, you know, my, my, my goal is even if somebody has somebody in their household that they want to change. 0 (13m 6s): I mean, I don't know if it's possible to change somebody else, just think about how hard it is to change ourselves. But I think we can be an inspiring example for somebody, you know, and that's, I think that's leadership, you know, whatever, whatever hat or role we're playing. 1 (13m 24s): Yeah. It's like that saying that says more is caught than taught. 0 (13m 28s): I like that. 1 (13m 29s): Yeah. That one's really stuck with me in the parenting realm, especially it's like, don't focus too much on this. Tell like, saying, this is what you do. It's just showing up as the person that you want to be. And then hopefully leading by example. 0 (13m 44s): Yeah. And I think, you know, in school, you know, I hope that they interject more social and emotional learning, you know, you know, helping people, having children develops a sense of, self-awareness a level of self-management and also, you know, social, emotional, do they be able to manage relationships and, you know, have awareness of those things because it's, it's a big part of how we develop, you know, as human beings. 1 (14m 14s): Yeah. School is huge and it's, that's the most impressionable time of our lives. And for some reason there's still not an update there. We have, you know, this 19th century education system and it just doesn't really apply anymore. So I think like right now we have our son in a Montessori school, which I think is great, but it only goes to eighth grade. So then you're like, well, what do you do after you give them all this freedom? And then you stick them into a traditional school. He's going to be like, what is this? I've just sit for eight hours a day and be talked at. And it's like, we have so much information that we all just don't learn at the same speed or our aren't the same. And it goes into having, what's the book that I just started this book, I think it's called reeducation Charles Murray or something that it talks about multiple intelligences. 1 (15m 4s): So like, just because someone is, you know, excelling in math and someone else might be falling short, it's like, well, where, where should we be placing this kid? You know what I mean? And saying, we all have to be A's in every category and it kind of comes full circle to purpose, right? So it's at this young age, we should be in this very curious state of exploring all of these topics to see what you want to spend your adulthood going after, instead of acting like we're all identical carbon copies of one another. So I think right now, especially in the millennials and the gen Z is we have this purpose crisis. Like, what am I supposed to be doing? What am I supposed to be passionate about? What am I supposed to be spending all of my time away from my family and my loved ones? 1 (15m 48s): Like, what's that sacrifice for? And I know that you've talked a little bit about purpose on like several other podcasts. So I would love for free because when I look at someone like you, right, it's someone who's like, who's clearly found it, or maybe it found you, or maybe it's a combination, but I find it so interesting that you have these series of traumatic brain injuries, and now you're like a master of the Mind. 0 (16m 15s): Yeah. Thank you. So I'm going to say, I think you make me a blush a little bit. I don't know if people are listening to this or watching it on, on, on, on a screen, on a screen somewhere, but I feel like I'm going back to what you said about children. You know, I think it's, it's interesting because it's not, it's not always how it's not how smart you are. It's I think the better question is how are you smart at how smart somebody is or your children are, but maybe how are they smart? And as you said, it's, it's, you know, people are at different speeds, but they also learn different ways. You know, when you're studying multiple intelligence theory, which is created by, by Howard Gardner out of Harvard, it's basically saying it's just any, I mean, if you look at the SATs, you know, they have verbal and yet mathematical, but they're, you know, it's just the standardized tests. 0 (17m 6s): There's so many other ways that somebody could have genius expressed a level of expertise. You know, what about visual, spatial intelligence? People are just great artists or architects or graphic designers. You know, that's amazing. I'm always impressed by those people who have expressed that strength or kinesthetic intelligence, people who just have an amazing, you know, affinity for and gifts around using their body answers or athletes. So on, you know, there's also like interpersonal intelligence people, you know, they get to just really great that communicating and that there's so, so there's so many different forms. And I don't think, you know, a lot of the standard, those tests out there could really, it's like, Hey, you know, me, you know, the same potential, Allie, do you have your aid is the same as you're going to have when you're 88. 0 (17m 51s): So I don't, I don't buy into intelligence is fixed, but going in this area of, of purpose and passion for me, passion purposes, a little bit different, you know, sometimes people, when we use it interchangeably for me, I define it more as passionate, something that lights you up and purposes, how you take that passion to light other people up. And so that's a very functional way of kind of how I organize it in my mind, my, my passion hasn't always been learning. You know, I struggled until the age of 18, you know, from all through school, elementary school, middle school, junior high, high school, until I discovered and developed the, these strategies and these tools and these strengths. 0 (18m 36s): But now PA I have a passion for learning. There's not a day. I could go without listening to a podcast or reading a book or having a deep conversation or, you know, going online, going to a conference. And I just love learning that lights me up. And I've discovered that my purpose is helping other people to learn so that they could like themselves up and that really helped light them up and they can shine and not dim themselves. And so with, with children, I think, you know, passion is not about necessarily choosing the right path or some kind of professional destiny. I think it's about experiment, you know, giving yourself stimulus or, you know, parents of providing stimulus or novelty and see where that child or see where yourself, what ignites your interest, your curiosity, or your, your joy. 0 (19m 27s): You know, I think it's about rediscovering sometimes more our authentic self, you know, and when I say authentic self, I mean that part of you, that, that, that comes alive, right? Not the one that's been muted or sedated, you know, somehow buried underneath a pile of other people's expectations or needs or opinions. And it drowning out the noise of marketing and media saying that you're not enough. You have to be a certain kind of way. And so I think what I'm with passion is giving like children, for example, enough stimulus or we're all children, no matter what your age, if you're 18 or 80, giving yourself enough stimulus to see where your heart goes, your curiosity goes, which you start thinking about, it's kind of taken up a lot of your mind share. 0 (20m 11s): And then, and then just discovering it is just as part of it. But also you also have to develop it. It's like people talk about relationships and they want to discover true love. You know, you could this, you could discover a person, but it takes, you have to develop it to write. You have to build it every single day by showing up. And it's not just even in relationships like a 50 50 thing. It's like, you know, you, people knowing themselves giving a hundred percent of themselves, someone else doing the same. I, my, my, my dogs in the background 1 (20m 43s): Happens to me all the time. There's like a bag that floats out the front window and then they both go nuts. So it's no worries. It's just part of the whole virtual podcasting. No, I, I mean, I totally agree. I think it's really hard to find, or I guess to maybe rediscover your authenticity when you have so much noise around you. And I actually wrote that all down, when you have social media constantly telling you that you're not enough. And for me, it's like, it goes into one of your aunts, right? So your automatic negative thoughts and my number one, cause I love that you have the little accountability exercises throughout the book. 1 (21m 24s): It makes, it makes you pay extra attention and then honest and like do a self evaluation as you're reading, which I think is super helpful. So mine, I mean, I fall into this all the time and I think it probably happens for people who spend a lot of time on social media, which is comparing or saying I'm not enough. And then seeing these metrics like these external figures that are saying, you're not enough because you're like, well, I only got this many views and they got this many views, right. It's terrible for your self-esteem. And then it gets really easy to try to tweak the version of yourself to get more engagement. And then you're kind of giving away pieces of yourself and your authenticity in doing so. 1 (22m 6s): So it's like, how do you, how do you take the feedback constructively without sacrificing your authenticity? 0 (22m 16s): Wow, that's a big question. I mean, my, where my mind goes when, when you, when we having this conversation is I believe I, maybe we could have an, everyone has a, to do list, right? And I think we should work like, like really focused and, and relentlessly on building a, not to do list, you know, certain things that you don't want to, you know, put your energy towards. It's easy to say, you know, don't compare yourself to others, you know, but part of how we identify ourselves is how we stand out, you know, and how we fit in. Right. And interesting as a child thinking about it, I haven't really thought about it, but, you know, I desire to fit in, but we also have this desire to also stand out, you know, when it comes to caring what other people think. 0 (23m 6s): And I really do believe fundamentally in how we present ourselves. It takes a lot of energy, right? Like it's like all this energy we sometimes put into the image we want to put out there. Right. And then there's this more energy also put into the person that we're afraid people will, you know, like we, we fear people are going to say, and then maybe it's, there's another energy body like ourselves. So it's like, our energy is split like three different places and people wonder why they feel burnt out or they just feel exhausted, you know, all the time. And when it comes to fueling yourself, if we fuel our life with the opinions and expectations of those us, both positive and negative, I'll say an on both sides, then we're going to probably run out of gas. 0 (23m 51s): Right. Cause it's not very sustainable. And you know, it's nobody, nobody has the right necessarily to define who we are. Right. And I think that it's, it's easy to say, but the only opinion about ourselves and our dreams, you know, that counts as ourselves. And I think we do ourselves a disservice when we let the noise of other people's opinions and expectations distort our own reality. You know, it's the birth of our own thoughts. It turns out our own true voice of who we are. And I'm not saying we don't learn from other people and get mentors, but no owning that we are, you know, we, and we alone are a hundred percent responsible for our life, you know? 0 (24m 32s): And so it's, it's not easy. Like there's a lot of things are very simple, but that doesn't, but they're being also that difficult. And so comparison is it is a challenge because when we overthink or we have self judgment, you know, I really feel like we talk about it in the book, like digital depression, you know, where we're constantly comparing ourselves to the highlight trailer of, you know, the people they're there. And sometimes, you know, the grass is greener on the other side because of the filter they're using, or there's a lot of artificial turf online also as well. The truth is it's greener, you know, where we water it and where we nurture it. And then when we nourish flourishes, right. 0 (25m 14s): So, you know, my, my thing is because it's easy, you know, with when, you know, as, as you build following and everything, it really feel like that's that's life for me, honestly, social media. It's not because I'm so enlightened. I just, it stresses me out honestly. So I spend less and less time over the years on it. But I would say when, if you're going to use comparison, the person we should be comparing ourselves to is, you know, this ourselves who we were yesterday, you know, or maybe comparing yourself to the best version of yourself, you know, it's not about being perfect. It's about the progress, right? It's about the consistent effort that you bring every single day that lead to incremental changes in our life. 0 (25m 59s): Because I think little by little, a little becomes a lot and that's really, that's how winning happens. Right. That's how transformation happened. 1 (26m 7s): <inaudible> no, I couldn't agree more. I wanted to go back to a part in the beginning of your book, and then we mentioned a little bit earlier in the podcast. So when, so when it comes to your story, again, there there's so many moments of serendipity that I see throughout, like your life or at least that's how it presents itself. Right? So you have, you're about to quit college and you're overwhelmed and you just like happened to go to this friend's house and happen. You're his dad happens to ask you the perfect question to just take off all of that armor and you just let all of your emotions and your feelings and your frustrations out. 1 (26m 47s): And then that kind of set you. Maybe, I don't know if it's like overstating, but set you on a different path or maybe nudge use in a certain direction. I did want to ask, did you get that list all the way done? Do you still have, 0 (27m 2s): You know, reflecting on it? I wish I had that physical list still. There's so many moves and I also lived in a number of cities and I hope someday I can rediscover it, but remembering what a lot of things on that list were for, for as context for everybody, I was ready to quit school. And I didn't cause I wasn't doing well in my freshman year and I didn't have the money to be there. And, and a mentor asked me, well, why are you in school? What do you want to be, do have share, and maybe make this like bucket list if you will, you know, re 30 years ago. And, but because of it, it got me into my purpose in terms of why. 0 (27m 46s): And honestly, a lot of things on that list were things I wanted to do for my family. You know, things they could never afford, or even if they could afford, they wouldn't do it for themselves. So I'm happy to say at least 80% of the things on that list or were definitely accomplished. Yeah. And it makes me happy because I think, you know, in terms of purpose, then the changes over time. Cause we change over time, but the things that light us up and I think every, I think reasons produce results, reasons, reap results in our life. And sometimes we feel a little bit disconnected with things, not feel fulfilled or engaged. I think it's important. I always tell people the most important thing is to get the most important thing, the most important thing, you know? 0 (28m 30s): And just, and, and that's, that's kind of like your true north, I think especially the past couple years, like I think people are very sensitized to, you know, sometimes it takes life conditions and difficulty or a pandemic or something to be able to help you to get clear on, on, on who you are and what you value the most. Yeah. So I like setting things up around, around that. I don't feel like I have to motivate myself a lot when, when you find more and more that thing that, that, that drives you. 1 (29m 3s): Yeah. So when you, I guess, are being led by purpose or something bigger, do you feel like that's, when things start to kind of present themselves to you, like opportunities start to happen. Another case was your Marvel studios story, which was really great. And you were having this really great exchange that led you to be on the production set of X men, which is amazing. And it's, I think lending yourself, I don't know, being vulnerable and authentic and paying attention to certain signs. And then that's when these tend to flourish for you. I don't know that's how you see it. 1 (29m 45s): Or if you're just, you can find meaning in anything and not necessarily everything has meaning kind of, 0 (29m 51s): I mean, I don't, that's a great question. I don't know what the truth is, but I know what I decide is for me, because I just honestly don't know if it's coincidence or it's provenance or it's, you know, something that I'm designing. I choose to believe that I choose to believe, and I don't have a lot of evidence to back this up, but it's just kind of my belief that certain things are meant to happen, but then we also have free will, but to do that, like, like certain things maybe we're meant to connect, but then you have free will, whether you push it forward and you have choice. Right? And so I feel like I do know from a brain perspective that when you're looking for things, you're going to find it part of your brain called the reticular activating system, where at any given time there's a billion stimuli, we can be paying attention to. 0 (30m 41s): So primarily we're leading most of the stuff out and we start to pay attention to things that are interesting to us that are important to us. And I find that when we start asking those questions, we start letting those things in. But I think for the most part there's opportunity surrounding all of us, it's just, do we see it in front of us? Right. And that that's, I think the difference that makes the difference there. I did a podcast. We have a podcast that, that we do. It's just like 15 minutes long, but I did one on getting unstuck. And I think all of us, sometimes we feel like we're stuck. Right? And it was a story about a driver that, you know, is driving a very tall truck and wasn't paying attention. And so the driver goes underneath the bridge and he gets stuck because the truck is just too tall. 0 (31m 27s): And the more and more that he presses on the gas and lo and behold, it, the more stuck it becomes. And then he tries to back out and he can't back out anymore. And then a crowd starts gathering around, wanting to know what's going on, there's traffic backing up. And the emergency supports, you know, they start showing up and they started coming up with different ideas. They started pushing the truck in nothing happened. They all started pulling it out and nothing happened. And they came to the conclusion that they would have to like blow up the truck. That that's what, you know, all these experts thought about, you know, and then pull out the residual pieces. So the traffic blow through. But when they came to that conclusion, there's this six year old child in, in the crowd and, and the child just yells out. 0 (32m 10s): Why don't you just let the air out of the tires? Right. And then they did that low and behold, the truck lowered and they were able to back it out. I think the answers are always there. I have a belief that, that it is, but we don't necessarily see all the answers. I don't like the elusive obvious. And so I think a lot of times, you know, if we're looking for something and, you know, looking for opportunity, the challenges and you, you know, like we we've done podcasts on this too. It's just whatever you just like, there's an algorithm to Instagram, whatever you engage with, they give you more of you do watch all the cat videos, they show you more cats, share cats, come and cats, cats, and then you think their whole Instagram, it says cats, right. 0 (32m 54s): Well, your mind has that algorithm to whatever you engage with, you get more of. And so if people are just looking at what's dark and threatening and scary and fear-based media, if it bleeds, it leads, right. Which is a big control mechanism, right. When somebody is fearful, you know, and their survival brain mode, it really you're, you're, you're held hostage away from rational thinking. You're held hostage a rating from logic, right. And that's a different conversation, but if I'm just focused on what, like scary and threatening, I'm engaging with that, just like the cat videos. And so I start seeing threatening, dark, scary things all over the place, the challenge though, and leaves very small bandwidth or gratitude for possibility, for opportunity. 0 (33m 38s): Right. And so I believe that, you know, the things that we look for, we see, we see more of. And so the part of it, I think is, is this more neurologic? 1 (33m 49s): No, that I love that story with the truck. It actually made me, so we were, we were driving the other morning and there was this lady coming in the opposite direction. And it's like a four lane, four lane road with like a suicide lane in the middle. And it's very busy and people's speed. And she's in the far right lane going about five miles an hour and we're just watching and we're like, what's happening. And she's kind of swerving. I was like, she drunk at eight in the morning, like this is crazy. And we just realized, because we were going in the same direction that she was just lost, but she was so frazzled and like so upset and anxious at not knowing where she was, that she was behaving in this way, that could be interpreted as drunk. 1 (34m 34s): And it's just, as you said, when you're in that state, it's really hard to critically think or to problem-solve you kind of get, well, you actually literally do get tunnel vision when you're in that state. And then my husband goes, well, we've all been drunk at 8:00 AM and not talking about like actually being drunk, but the neurological effects rate of just having that limited capability of problem solving and just being aware of your, your space and time. And I was curious, so do you have any hacks for when you find yourself in that high angst or a state of frustration or anger, to be able to kind of pull yourself out to soften it a bit so that you don't miss, or you don't, you're not as easily influenced all of those things. 0 (35m 23s): I think all of learning and all of life is the state dependent in our emotions. You know, when thinking about it, we're not logical. We are aware biological. When you think about dopamine and oxytocin and serotonin, we are this like chemical feeling soup and we don't do things logically as much as we do emotionally. Right. And, and so if we're in a confused, fearful state, we're not gonna, we're not gonna parent the Best. We're not going to study for that exam the best. We're not going to give that wonderful toast at that wedding that we want to, or, or be able to perform on the field. Right. And so chronic stress, it actually shrinks the human brain where we're creating cortisol and adrenaline all the time. 0 (36m 6s): It puts us in fight or flight or freeze, and that's not a place you want to live and build, you know, your dreams and create, you know, the, you know, your, your desired life, chronic fear, by the way, suppresses the human immune system area of psych psycho neuro immunology, right. That makes you more susceptible to colds the flu's the viruses. And, you know, like, you know, the fear is certainly a virus, you know, into itself. And it really compromises them when we're in fight or flight or refreezing, you know, the challenges we're not, we're not accessing the parts of ourselves, that executive functioning, where we could, you know, that higher order, rational thinking that those creative centers of our, of our mind. 0 (36m 50s): And so if you get flustered right from, oh my God, I'm so nervous. I have to give this presentation. Or I'm scared of approaching that person I'm attracted to, or, you know, studying for this exam. You know, we, the first thing to do is obviously you want to control how you feel. You know, I think it's important. Everyone has to do their to-do list. But I think what if we cultivated a, to feel list every single day, you know, these are three emotions. Like I wanna, I want to build and develop, you know, because emotions are, everybody has a set point, right? Like they just have a set point for happiness or a set point for stress. And that's kinda like their norm. But I also feel like it's a muscle too, that the more we, we, you know, like we look for stuff that's funny, or we watch funny things, we go to comic clubs, whatever. 0 (37m 36s): Then we just, we cultivate those things. Same thing with love, you know, or anything. So I think one of the questions you ask yourself before you need to perform is not VR. If anyone here is facing a dilemma or a decision or a difficulty, most people ask, what do I need to do? I would say, step back from that question, instead of saying, what do I need to do now? Who do I need to be? Right. And come from, because if you are going to choose to be compassionate, you know, in a difficult light arguing, maybe you're entering an argument with your significant other or a child. Then if you choose to be compassionate, then the behavior takes care of itself. Right? If you choose to be loving or understanding, you know, the behavior happens, the actions happen more naturally. 0 (38m 21s): I think the fastest way to change the way you feel is through our body. Sometimes it's hard just to like mentally just change things in your mind. But I think sometimes when we move our body in different ways, it puts us in a different place. So in that could be something as, as getting up and dancing or listening to some music, putting a big, silly smile on your face, you know, something that gets you out of that mode because it just, and then also you generally changes the feeling pattern of the people around us also as well, because it's unexpected, right. It kind of interrupts their, their normal training of feeling also. So I would say yes, of course we have autonomy on how we feel. Nobody can, you know, even though sometimes we feel like, oh, we react to the environment to media, to politics, to the weather. 0 (39m 9s): We, we decide, right? One of my favorite books is a book by Victor Frankl called man's search for meaning. And I think it's important that we can choose what experiences mean to us. And so what I would say is always start with our body, you know, like moving our body, putting our shoulders back, you know, our physiology affects our psychology in a big way. And this, the second thing is just to remind ourselves that, you know, we are not our thoughts. Right. And we don't have to believe everything that we think. And it's easy to change our frame of mind by saying, if, if you're in a hot debate with somebody asking a different question, like what's silly about this, you know, do I really want to be right? Or do I want to be in love, you know, changing your focus on this. 0 (39m 50s): Something that's might be more empowering sometimes what we resist in life as the persist, right. You fight. And then they, that person like, you know, kind of digs their heels in. And then you're just like, then you just feel exhausted and you can even just forget about what everything, you know, why did I even start from the beginning? But I would say we control the way we feel and we're going back to choice and the power of choice. We can always decide what to think, how, you know, what we react, you know? And those actions lead to experience that experience lead to feelings and those feelings feed those thoughts again. So it becomes very cyclical. And we have a choice point at all times to decide what those things are. So yeah, we're, we're, we were definitely stronger and have more control than we realize, but we always control the controllables, even with children. 0 (40m 36s): Like if it's a bad weather, you know, outside bad, and that's been, there's a judgment on it's raining or storming, you know, like even when we were talking about in the beginning of the conversation, it's like, if we act all it did, this sucks, it's so bad outside. And we're teaching a child like your feelings and emotions are dependent on the weather and even something subtle like that. Right. And then we just give up our agency or our sovereignty, you know, to something outside of ourselves. 1 (41m 5s): No, I that's one of my favorite books. I think it's one of those that every single person needs to read. It's just enlightening. You're like, if someone can go through the darkest, darkest possibilities of human existence and come out the way that he did and with his reference, anything is possible. And I loved your reference for fear. Did you see that video that Tony Robbins made? I think it was like the beginning of 2020, and it was all on fear and it was like this very cinematic music kind of thing. And he was because it it's just that, right. If you are in a state of fear, they've done studies, your immune system goes in the trash and what a time for that to happen. 1 (41m 48s): Right? So you want to have this boosted immune system. You want to be healthy and vibrant, but everywhere you look, they are perpetually dumping fear on you. And you're like, whoa, that's irresponsible knowing the data. So it's up to the individual to turn off of those, turn off all of those devices and those channels that are making you feel that way and do something that makes you feel healthy and happy and, and re like, and it gives you a sense of vigor. Do you know what I mean? 0 (42m 14s): Yeah. I think it's so important to disconnect so we can reconnect some times because, you know, if you watch like social dilemma on some of these documentaries, you know, in terms of digital and I'm not negative against technology, it allows this to happen. Right. It's amazing, but it's really how it's used. And you know, they talk about billions of dollars are being spent. They would be able to control our, our time and our attention, which is the one thing that's what our life is made out of. People could always make more money or something, but they can't get that time back or then that focus or that attention back. And, you know, and they have not only billions of dollars that are directing you to their platform or their product, but they also have, you know, some of the top Pines on the planet, you know, behavioral psychologists that really understand what it takes that really kind of hijack our focus. 0 (43m 6s): And, but, so that's why we have to be, we have, we need some kind of resolve, right. We need to be able to own our habits and, and be able to technology is a wonderful tool for us to use. But if the technology is using us, then, then who becomes the tool. Right. And I feel like that it's wonderful for it makes their life so convenient and we have access to the world's information. And I think it's nice to go outside and go for a walk and get grounded and get some sunlight and play outside and not spend a lot of time on, on, on devices. 1 (43m 38s): No, I couldn't. Couldn't agree more. It's having that healthy balance between all of it and yeah, you can't, you cannot make it in today's society without having technology be some significant part of your life. It's going to be very, very difficult. And I, I was curious too. So when it comes to technology and the brain, and you see things like Neuralink that are promising to be in your mind's eye, what did he say? Like 20, 20, 30 or something? 0 (44m 10s): It was 1 (44m 12s): Crazy soon. Are you excited about this? Are you gonna be a first adopter? Are you going to wait and see what's your appeal? Cause you've somehow done what he's going to do with the device, but you've done it organically and naturally. So I like your perspective would be interesting. 0 (44m 31s): Yeah. I, I thought I've done some, some deep thought on, on this and, and, and reading and just thought experiments. I think everybody ultimately has to choose just like right now, you know, we have access to a lot of technology, how much we want to, to engage in it. Here's, here's, here's my stance. I'm not going to be an early adopter for all. A lot of that, you know, I, I like to do things more, what I consider more and more and more natural, but then again, you know, I didn't foresee myself having, you know, when we, when, when I was growing up, like they would say, oh, you would never have a calculator with you. So you have to do this math and be able to do it on paper or in your head. But we have calculators, we have everything inside of our pockets, right. 0 (45m 15s): And it's always with an arm length, like that's some scary within like 90% of our day, we're with an arm length distance of our devices. And so, you know, is there a difference between having it out here or just, you know, implanting it, you know, here, and, and, and again, it is incredibly convenient to have access to, you know, I do trainings at Facebook, at Google, even space X and Nike and performance organizations. You know, when I did trainings, even at Google, they were like one person Lee stood up. He's like, why do I need to be able to have a good memory? We built this search engine, right. I had the world's exit. And my honest answer is what I'm talking about. Organic is I think part of we are as human beings is I lost my grandmother to Alzheimer's when I was very young. 0 (46m 1s): And so when I was going through my learning difficulties and my three traumatic brain injuries, you know, that all these things formed, you know, my, my values and my, the direction of my life. But I feel like it's not just remembering facts, figures, porn, languages, the stuff that we teach in our podcast and books and courses, it's remembering our life. Our life is worth living, it's worth remembering. And the truth is what I talked about, you know, to this individual and Google was that, you know, our life is the sum total of all of the decisions we make true. And we can only make good decisions based on the knowledge that we have. And if we have knowledge, it presupposes, we remember it. Right. And, you know, while it's good, you know, I don't want to memorize 500 phone numbers. Right. 0 (46m 41s): But it should be concerning. We've lost the ability to remember one or two or three phone numbers in number or a passcode or something somebody just said, or something we just read or something we weren't going to say or somebody's name. And that definitely interrupts, you know, our, our efficiency or effectiveness. And I want, I want them just like, you know, just like, you know, we work out and exercise and because we want to feel alive, we want to feel strong. We want to feel healthy. We don't want our, you know, parts the atrophy. Well, I don't want this. You know, I always have brains all around me and shirts on my brain, just not only for branding right now, but also because we, what we see, we take care of. We, you see your hair, you see your skin, you see your cars, your clothes, you take care of those things, but we don't always see the thing that controls everything, which is just our brain, right. 0 (47m 29s): It's, that's why probably where, you know, the brain shirts and point to my brain all the time, just to remind us to love our brain. So I would say that I would love to get the most out of my current, you know, organic self, because I am, I am passionate, you know, pursuing potential that, that, that, that just lights me up more than anything, the potential in myself, potential in other people that are around me. And so I love that. I love to take a natural approach to as many things as possible, you know, but then again, you know, I, I, I swim in the ocean, you know, every single day I go hiking. I like them like more natural. That way that being said, I love my devices. 0 (48m 10s): I'm not going to lie. I love having access to, you know, to every movie elevated and show a podcast, YouTube video with creative thoughts. And so I want to be able to have that, and I'll do as much as I can, you know, through training and, and, and personal fitness and lifestyle, not to maximize that. And I won't be the first ones anymore than I'd be the first ones to, I do a lot with Virgin and, and Richard. And, but I don't want to, I don't want S one of those first thousand seats, I just don't know, but I'm very curious. Would it be like to, I've done zero G flights and stuff, myself, anything gets me out of my head because I have to be pretty heady in my life. 0 (48m 53s): But, but yeah, I'll be somewhere, somewhere in the middle. And I am excited about what it can do in terms of fighting disease and, and, you know, give us thoughts. They build a Turk cancer. I mean, who knows the potentiality of it, you know, for me, I put my stuff out there. 95% stuff is just free on YouTube or podcasts, or what have you. Cause, cause I don't know if there's some child in some village and you know, in some third world country that listens that has access to mobile and listens to a show and on creativity or innovation, they, and they do come up with, they become the next Malala or, you know, big thinker and they're, they're out there doing the, you know, the good work. 1 (49m 32s): No, I think it's always great when you see people that have a lot of open source information, because I think it, it really magnifies the type of person or I guess maybe their goal, right? Like if, if you say that your goal is to really enlighten humanity, but then everything's behind a paywall and it's priced astronomically, then I don't know. I'm like, well, you should be giving something back. It has to come back to contribution on some level. And obviously everyone needs to get paid, but it's again, it's like finding that balance between growing yourself and then being able to grow other people alongside of that. Oh, thanks. When you were talking, when we were just talking about like the potential of your brain organically and then all of the technology, and sometimes have you seen the movie onward? 1 (50m 20s): It's a Disney movie, so it's about magic and it's about a world of magic and everyone forgot that it existed because technology happened. So you would have these beings that could like fly or where they were fiercely strong and brave, and they just forgot who they were because they got so stuck in the day-to-day life and, and modern day living. And I was like, man, if that's not a metaphor for today, right? Like we just don't have potential because everything is, is handed to us and it's a Google search way. So you actually inspired me to stop Googling so much. And I kid you not, I saw results in like a week, less than maybe I would force myself to kind of visualize a little hamster in my brain and that they would be running down into my subconscious and like shuffling through the information. 1 (51m 15s): Cause I'm like, I know it's there. It just needs to be retrieved and brought back up. So I would do that little exercise and then I would start recalling information a lot quicker than I used to. So 0 (51m 26s): It makes me, it gives me, it gives me goosebumps. I call, I call them truth bumps because I feel like we all have that potential. And sometimes again, technology is wonderfully convenient. But then, you know, in the book, you know, in the opening, I talk about those digital forces, the, the, the, of like the, the mental apocalypse, if you will. But one of them is digital day lose just too much information too little time. That's what you read, teach speed, reading, celebrate and learning. And there's digital distraction because there is a price to pay being on a devices all the time. Are we getting this dopamine flood, you know, where we're just like addicted to it, right? And so we get distracted by every light share common cat video app notification, social media alert. 0 (52m 7s): It just goes on and on. And we wonder why we can't focus in a meeting or focus when we need to read or be there with our kids or whatever. And then besides digital delusion, digital distraction, do you have digital dementia? Chin, our memories used to be so much sharper, but we now we don't have to remember anything. Right. But the last one, besides the digital depression, which we talked about comparison is digital. I coined this term digital deduction and digital deduction is kind of like digital dementia where we don't have words about instead of memory, it's about our thinking ability, because a lot of things, especially in media or even school, they teach you what to think, but not how to think. Right. And so, because it takes so much cognitive energy sometimes to think, and we just like defaulted to algorithms that tell us, whoa, what are you hungry for? 0 (52m 56s): When should you do this? You know, our, even like you know, whether it's politics or anything else that you're engaging with, it just shows you more the validate what you already believe, you know, as opposed to having to look at something and like zero-based thinking and, and be able to think for ourselves. And I think that's, that's a challenge for children and even adults also as well, we get overwhelmed with so much. We just want to be told what to do, what to think and that's overload or confused mind, you know, it doesn't do anything. You know, it just usually defaults to an authority, you know, whatever giving power, because it was just so overwhelming. We don't want to think because it takes so much energy. You know, we're already tired from doing all that, everything we're doing with work and trying to balance everything. 0 (53m 42s): So I would say that thinking is like a muscle I'm just seeming wearing the shirt for those of you watching. Like I decided it was a very pro our ability to, you know, school teaches us what to learn and what to remember what to think, but not how to learn, how to remember and how to think. And I think those core skills are very important to add as well as the social, emotional stuff we talked about also. 1 (54m 3s): Yeah, no, I, yeah, I totally agree. I was when it comes to like thinking from zero for, I forget who is saying this, but they said a really good practice for developing critical thinking. And to kind of step into your own independent thought is to go back to the original pieces of work, the original biographies and philosophies, and like reading Aristotle and reading Socrates and reading Marcus Aurelius, like going back to the original thought leaders and get off of social media, which is such a dumbed down version of that. And then to kind of assess where you fall in between those lines and to develop your own style and belief system and values rather than having someone decide those for you. 1 (54m 50s): Because if you don't know what you're, I feel like a lot of people were like this and even myself just up until somewhat recently is not having that clear definition of what your values are and your beliefs and your principles, because that's going to guide you and that's going to guide your family. And then that's ultimately going to determine your future, whether you are cognizant of it or not 0 (55m 10s): Very much so. And I think that part of it is because we're so overloaded. You know, I don't know a lot of people are working from home or they're living at work. They just confused, you know, everything everything's changing, they don't even schedule a time to think, you know, schedule a white space or they do. They're thinking like in between things and it's kind of kind of rushed. And I think that the future belongs to those deep thinkers and those creators. And that's our value in society today. You know, most of the people who are listening or watching this, they're not paid purely further physical physicality, like their brute strength, but you know, a lot of it is our brain strength, you know, and where a lot of jobs they go to, it goes to become automated or artificial intelligence. 0 (55m 54s): You know, what's not going to be outsourced as easily are things that machines, problem solving, you know, creativity here, our ability to, to imagine things. I mean, these are the things that are truly limitless and, and that's really, you know, we live in a very exciting times. I believe the future belongs to the creators, but you know, we're not taught a process for thinking. I think it's also not only are we not dedicating time to do those activities. I love to just, I mean, not everybody, it maybe in their mind afford to take 30 minutes just to shut down. But if you don't have 30 minutes, then I feel like you need to take an hour or more and just be able to do, do those things, you know? 0 (56m 36s): Well, and sometimes we're just so addicted to saying, oh, I'm just so busy. And we get some kind of secondary gain by saying we're busy because we're communicating, you know, I'm important because I'm so busy. The problem is we start designing our life to be busy all the time. And we wonder why we're stressed and burnt out and just exhausted. So, so in, in the, we do a whole chapter on critical thinking and problem solving and decision-making, which I think are just, you know, course strategies we should have learned back in school. And a lot of the thinking that's out there is this. We have about 50 to 70,000 thoughts thinking about thinking a day, the challenges, 95% of those thoughts are the same thoughts we had yesterday. And the day before that. 0 (57m 16s): And the day before that, and we wonder if thoughts lead to actions and actions lead to results or experiences and experiences, give those feelings. Then back to thoughts. If we have the same thoughts where the renew, the same actions, get the same results and have the same feelings and it becomes cool. And so when do we actually sit down and be able to make small adjustments, because one step in another direction to completely change your destination, right? Some people will call it their destiny and that's the power. And it's, again, it's that simple, but sometimes it's that difficult, right? That's why I think it's important to expose yourself to things that, you know, make you think, you know, like podcasts and all the things we have unfettered access to like all of the world's information, you know? 0 (57m 60s): And so it's exciting without a doubt. 1 (58m 3s): That's also, it also made me think of a compliment of your book is that it's not the traditional Hustle Culture mentality that you see everywhere. Like you, you value sleep and you value rest and like recharging. And I think that's so crucial. I, I really hope that becomes the new trend is people that are putting a high priority high priority on not burning out. Right. And not like whose calendar has the most appointments, because that's not going to lead you to feeling fulfilled or recharged or any of that. So with your sleep chapter, I thought it was interesting because you gave a lot of like neuroscience, right? 1 (58m 44s): What, what happens cleaning out the plaque and kind of helping preserve it against neurodegenerative disorders like Alzheimer's or dementia, but you all the part that really got me was like the magic piece, which was, you know, all of these brilliant people got their ideas and their dreams. And I don't know if you're familiar. I think it was Thomas Edison. And he had this protocol when he was trying to come up with a new invention, as he would sit in front of the fire with these weight bearing like those, what do you call them? Like those like heavy ball, like ball iron balls with plates underneath. And he would recline and he would get a little bit drowsy. 1 (59m 26s): So putting himself into a feta state and then just as he would dip, he would drop the balls, wake himself up and then immediately journal. And then a lot of his ideas came that way. So I'm curious if you have an opinion on where these ideas are coming from, is it mystical? Do you have more like of a science backed in Sarah? Like, what's your theory? 0 (59m 51s): I mean, I'd love to believe that there's a universal mind and we have access to it. And you know, when you know, and we're connected and you know, certain people have the same idea, you know, roughly the same time, you know, I can't, you know, with authorities say that, but I choose to believe that there's, there's an intelligence. That's there going, going back to the, the, the sleep and the restoration. I think that's really important because you reach and then we can't be reaching all the time. Right? You can't just be working out all the time, you reach and then you have to recover and then you repeat, right? So you reach recover, restore, and then you repeat because health is health as well. Right. We know health as well. 0 (1h 0m 31s): Connection is the new currency. Inner peace is the new bridge. You know, service is the new success. Kindness is the new cool, you know, as it's always has been. Right. But I, I come from that place where you learn, so you could earn, so you could return kind of like what you were talking about in terms of giving back. And so that that's a spirit and the kind of the soul of what we, we talk about going back to the power of sleep. Yes, absolutely. If anyone's listening to this and they don't feel like they're getting the, you're not waking up refreshed, if you feel tired of Arctic, you have a brain fog. If you have trouble with long-term memory, those are all the benefits of getting good sleep. Because if you don't get a good night's sleep, you can't make decisions. The next day, your focus is everywhere. 0 (1h 1m 13s): Your temperament is, you know, very, sometimes we're not as rational or as kind the next day. But in addition to all that we dream also. And so a lot of our creativity comes from the data and the Delta states. So we have different brainwave states, right? Betas where we're awake, which is hopefully everyone who's listening right now is wide awake, alpha right below. It is the state of relaxed awareness. That's a state that we designed and we create for people to rapidly learn. Actually, that's where your conscious mind is set aside. And we just absorb information quicker because we don't have that critic conscious. So like, we are geniuses, right. But like our conscious mind can only handle so much. 0 (1h 1m 55s): A lot of what we've learned is unconscious. Like you think about, I don't know how many lyrics to songs do you know, like hundreds of thousands potentially, but how many of you sit down with no cards? Just like, you know, study unit and do any of that. We learn best when we don't even realize we're learning. Right. So we're all have that natural genius, but in the office state that you're, that's where your conscious mind is set aside. And you can just absorb television. We'll put you into an office state. If you've ever tried to talk to somebody they're really into their movie or show, and they don't hear you because they're in a trance because of television programming, which is kind of interesting, like the word programming. And it's one thing. 0 (1h 2m 35s): Yeah. It's dependent, depending on what we're watching is just, you know, that's, what's kind of going, going in. So beta alpha underneath alpha is that data state that you mentioned, and that's really the state of, of creativity. And there are certain things you could do to get into that. It's kind of like that in and out of sleep. Like when you first wake up, when you're going to bed, you have all these thoughts. And when you're taking a shower, I dunno like you, if you come up with these ideas, you know, when, when you, when you're, when you're taking a bath or a shower, just it's always, when you can't write things down, I took five showers this morning just to prep for our conversation. Good ideas for you. But the water puts us in that state, right. 0 (1h 3m 17s): If it relaxes us and it's, it's a great fertile ground for new ideas and new inspiration. And then Delta is when we're sleeping. And we'll probably spend about 20 years of our life sleeping 20 full years, about three to five years, total dreaming, you know, in that REM state. And that's, that's pretty amazing because, you know, as you mentioned, there's a lot of creation that happens in dream states. The ones I mentioned, the book like Mary Shelley created Frankenstein in her dream. You know, Paul McCartney came up with the song yesterday and his dream, a chemist created the framework of the periodic table. And his dream alive is how created the sewing machine. 0 (1h 3m 58s): Like, you know, he's being hunted by people and they're throwing Spears, but at the end of the spear, there was like a little hole. And he gave this idea for like a needle and just the whole machine, right. Came out of that. I know a lot of athletes, a lot of stories of athletes like Jack Nicholas, who was shooting high seventies. And he was in a real slump playing golf and get a dream about shifting his grip. Like it was so real for him. And he got on the, the course the next day and he, and he shaved like 10 points off of his game, you know? So it's like your mind doesn't shut off at night. It's actually in some ways more active. And what is it doing besides cleaning out plaque and, you know, restoring and integrating long-term memories. It's, it's coming up with ideas. 0 (1h 4m 39s): And one of the things, activities I do before I go to bed, actually I'll introduce the question in my mind before I go to bed. And kind of as, as a preface, have you ever like, had to wake up a certain time and you set the alarm clock, maybe it's particularly the early time, maybe you have to catch a flight or do something for your child and, and you wake up within minutes of that alarm and you're done, like, that's the power of the human mind, you know, that, that's how amazing it is. And so instead of just doing that, you know, what, if you had an intention before you went to bed to dream about certain things, you know, ask yourself some kind of question and don't, don't ruminate over it, but just think about it a little bit. 0 (1h 5m 22s): Like you want to know the answer to give us some positive energy, write it down, maybe in a dream journal. And then when you wake up, the first thing I do every morning, I pick up my journal. I only have like three or four things by my nightstand. Actually, that would be good interview question on a podcast. Like, what are the three or four, you know, what do you have on your nightstand? Right. Like for me, I have like my aura ring, like my sleep device. I have like a chili pad kind of thing that cools down my mattress because I sleep better in the cold, you know, different than my partner who likes a different, she likes a different temperature. I put a glass of water there and the night before that's room temperature. So when I wake up, I could just drink that water and stuff like that. And I have a fiction book and a journal. 0 (1h 6m 4s): Right. And so I just write in my journal, first thing in the morning was about the things in my dream, because a lot of times people will dream amazing things, but they'll forget that morning, you know, just like disappear out of their mind and they wonder where, where it went. But I found so many of my gems, you know, over, over, over the years came from that magic. 1 (1h 6m 26s): No, I think that's great advice is to have a journal by the bed. Definitely the water. And then, so I did this brain training thing and they said something very similar. They said, before you go to sleep or to take a nap, they say, ask data and you ask the question are there to solve the problem. And then hopefully it comes to in your sleep and again, not to ruminate on it and then just wake up and write whatever comes to you. So I think that's just so cool. It's just, again, it's the magic that gets me because it's so elusive and no one really knows. And all you have is just your feeling and your intuition about what it is, but nonetheless, it's still really neat. 0 (1h 6m 59s): Yeah. I, I think that's, and I think that's why we're here. You know, part of why we're here is like, you know, we have to take time and make time, you know, cause we're the greatest project wherever we're going to get to work on in us. We have to take time and make time to create magic. 1 (1h 7m 15s): <inaudible> well, I want to thank you again a hundred times over for doing this podcast. I had an amazing time. Can you please tell the listeners where they can follow you, how they can support you and where they can get your book? Yeah. 0 (1h 7m 28s): Candice, thank you so much. I could talk to you. I would love to do this again. Yeah. That'd be fun to go in and you go deeper in any of these areas. But I, I would say to everybody that there's a version of ourselves that we haven't met yet. And the goal is to show up every single day till we're introduced. And I, you know, I put my energy in the brain because I find that it's our minds that are really controlling and influencing every area. So if people find this interesting and they want to learn how to learn faster, how to read faster, how to improve their focus, remember names and languages and all that stuff. I put a link in my Instagram profile. So that's actually the easiest place. It has a link to a free a one hour speed reading amp session, a masterclass, just bring a book and I'll show everyone how to double their reading speed with better, more fun and comprehension. 0 (1h 8m 15s): There's links to our podcasts and our YouTube. And so it's one of the most binge listen to shows on Spotify because it's this short and people listen to it, how to remember names and how to give a speech without notes, what are the best brain foods and kind of fun topics. And then on social media and I would challenge everybody. Can I challenge everyone to do something? Yeah. I would love everybody to actually take a picture of wherever they take a screenshot of wherever you're consuming this right now and then post it and then tag both of us in it. So we get to see it. And what I would love for everybody to do is just put in the post one thing that they learned in this conversation, maybe a quote, or maybe something that they're going to do for their, for their brain, you know, to love their brain a little bit more. 0 (1h 8m 60s): And I'll actually repost some of my favorites just as you know, just cause I just, I think, you know, one of the best ways to learn something is the Sheridan teach it to somebody else. And so if you could put some, you know, reflect on this conversation, maybe post an idea or to tag us both. So we see it, I'll pre post the, some of my favorites and I'll actually send a copy of Limitless my book to a couple of people just as a thank you. Yeah, that would, that'd be fine. I think leaders are readers. You know, I just feel like that, you know, what a wonderful way to shortcut, you know, the, the you're getting what you want in life. You know, somebody's written a book on it, somewhere on negotiation or parenting or real estate or health and fitness. 0 (1h 9m 45s): And if you could sit down in a few days and read it, you can download decades into days. And that's an incredible advantage. And I just want to remind everybody that really like, you know, I want to thank you for making this possible and just, you know, I appreciate you bringing this information out to life. I appreciate not only what you do, but also the, the manner you do it, you know, you have this way about you where it's just because I think everybody needs this. I think everybody, I think life is hard because of, you know, we were talking about adversity or just two reasons, you know, because you're leaving your comfort zone or because you're, you're staying in it. You know what I mean? 0 (1h 10m 25s): And we grow by stretching ourselves and exploring the wondrous worlds that live beyond our current abilities and understanding and the toning. I appreciate this conversation and I hope people continue. You know, they listened, they listened to, they should listen to your show right from the beginning, you know what I mean? Cause there's these, these gems, one idea could completely change your life, you know, and you never know where it's going to come from. And some people are like, no, I don't want to do that. Cause I'm afraid of change. And then what if I was to ask everybody, you know, what, if you fast forward five or 10 years from now and your life is exactly the same. Exactly the same. There's no, no change, no progress. Would that make you happy? And so people who are fearful of change, I would say don't fear change, you know, be an agent of adaptation, right? 0 (1h 11m 11s): I know you had my friend, Tom bill, you on the show and he says thing like human mind, you invite, he's the ultimate adaptation machine. That is the vehicle we have. And so drive it to where you want to go and don't give up on the thing that you want most for the things that you want in the moment. Right? And, and you have power inside of you. I don't downgrade. Don't, don't shrink everything. That's possible. All the amazing things in the universe to put your mind, you know, expand your mind, fit all that, all the amazing things. That's possible magic. All about magic. 1 (1h 11m 44s): Yeah, me too. Oh my gosh. Again, this is amazing. And I wish we had more time to keep going. So I'll definitely have you back on, but I will also repost for everyone that shares. I'm really excited to see where everyone was, was listening and what they learned. So thank you again. And I'll see you guys soon. Well, that's it for this week's episode. If you enjoyed the podcast, please share it with a buddy. Share on your social. If you tag Jim or myself, we will retweet or repost our favorite ones. Again, just let us know where you were listening, where you were watching, maybe the something that you took away from the podcast, something cool that you learned. 1 (1h 12m 24s): And if you haven't left a five star review or if it's been a while and you have a moment, I would really appreciate you taking the time to do that. That actually helps me a ton when it comes to the algorithms and the search ability. So if you have a moment, leave a five star review and share it with a buddy. So I'll see you next time. Thank you.